What's that, you say?
I'm not ready?
Well, you're right.
I have so much to do.
Some of which are logistics. Packing, de-cluttering, calling approximately one million companies to set up cable/internet/electricity, etc. Finishing up my last few days at work. Organizing things at the hospital in Philly. Poring through a small mountain of paperwork. Familiarizing myself with a map...of the entire East Coast. Eating as much Mexican food as possible. The list goes on...
Of course, there is a whole 'nuther thing I have to do.
Say goodbye.
Gulp.
There are a whole lot of people I love, love, love in this great state of Texas.
As excited as I am about my new job, I am here to tell you that leaving ain't easy. Easy...is staying right here where I am comfortable. Where I have a good support system. Where I know my way around. Where I can jump in a car and drive a few hours in any direction and see people I love.
Leaving that will be hard. Leaving my family, my friends, my coworkers. Leaving my city...Austin, you mean so much to me. Leaving my church, my job, my apartment (as crazy as THAT sounds).
I want to say goodbye the right way.
Whatever that is.
And so, I thought I would write an open letter. To the meaningful people and things in my life, you know who you are.
To my family: Mom, Dad, and Emily,
I love you. So much. I know it is hard to see me go, but I appreciate your support of me leaving. As important as it is for me to move, for this job, this experience...it is equally important that you send me. You have always supported my brain, my education. And I love you for that. I know you want to tell me to stay, to tell me that it's too far away. And so I appreciate you not saying it, as funny as that sounds. I appreciate you encouraging me to go, because you know how important this is to me. Being away from you will be interesting, to say the least. The family group texts promise to be hilarious...I solemnly swear to attempt to document every funny thing that happens to me. So, yes, you will know when I fall on my rear in snow, probably in front of a large crowd. Or when someone says something funny to me-alriiiiiiiight! And, Em, if I see CraigChristoLiz in a crowd...you know what's going to happen. HEY CRAIG-EE!!
To my friends, my pups, my soul sisters,
Ironically, almost half of us will be together. Zoom and Samsies-see y'all very soon! The old maids of the East Coast, reppin' it! Windies-I miss you so much and can't wait to see you hopefully soon. Tish-I have loved getting to spend my last few weeks in Austin with you. Thanks for being my bucket list buddy...and for that trip to Ikea. Lisa and Caro-I miss y'all already. So much. Knowing you are a car trip away does good things for my soul. Leaving that will be hard, but I know airplanes are flyin' each direction. To all of you: I love each of you so much. I will miss our weekends in Austin at my apartment, air mattresses in abundance, giggling after Vino Vino...but it will make our time together that much better, whenever and wherever that will be. I have had y'all in my life for eight years, and our friendship is irreplaceable. Go play with the big dogs...I'm staying here with my puppies! Also, you come visit me...and I will produce some monkey bread and cheese ball. Just sayin'. :)
To my coworkers, my partners-in-crime,
Y'all are nuts. Period. It's why we are friends. I can honestly say I don't think I've ever had a day at work where I didn't laugh at something. And I can guarantee it was related to one of you. We have single-handedly kept the cell phone companies in business with our text messaging. I am a better nurse because of each of you. Thank you so much for all you have taught me, it means more than you know. Thank you, also, for being who you are. No one understands an ICU nurse better than another ICU nurse/RT/CA. Take care of one another and please don't go hungry :) Oh, and I fully expect photographic evidence of the GWT.
To Casa de Campos,
You two. What would I have done without you? For serious. Watching y'all as newlyweds has been one of the joys of my life. I can think of no better friends, but then, you are really my family. I love you both, and I'm crying, so I'm going to stop. :) Lolita, you are my sister from another mister. Eventually, we're going to have to find a way to work together again. Until then, if your patients need anything, just give them a little pancake or something. For their leetle hunger pains.
To my city, Austin,
Austin, TX, you have changed my life. I first came to you as an eighteen-year-old pipsqueak, and spent four-and-a-half years havin' the time of my life. I came back to you as an adult, and the past two years have being very different from my expectations, but no less life-changing. I have learned so much about myself in Austin. My life has transitioned greatly from new nurse, to experienced nurse, to now a new nurse practitioner. Graduate school was a pivotal time for me, personally and professionally. I have learned the importance of balance in life. I have learned the impossibility of "doing it all" and have experienced the joy of "having it all," because God gives freely of His grace. I have learned what it means to be a young single woman in a transitional period of life, and I am so grateful for my health, independence, and youth. Austin, you have prepared me for Philly. You have given me such an abundance of joy, and I truly believe there is no greater place on Earth. I will miss the sunny days on the lake, the abundance of breakfast tacos, the feeling of being alive, which permeates this whole city. But I know I take it with me, wherever I go. This isn't goodbye to the great city-it's see you later.
To all of you goes all my love. I can't wait to see what's in store for me in Philly.
Robert Frost said it better than I.
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
"The Road Not Taken" by Robert Frost
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